Found this Shayari…

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I’ve found this shayari, of which I don’t know its source but I like it very much. If someone can help me with that, I would be very thankful. 

Agar hum door ho jayein,
Kahin duniya mein kho jayein,
Batao kya karoge tum?
Hume dhoondo ge ya,
Phir bhool jaoge,
Hume awaz do ge ya,
Kisi guzri kahani mein hamara naam likh lo ge,
Chalo aisa hi kar lena,
Tum khud bhi badal jana,
Hume tum bhool hi jana,
Magar itni guzarish hai,
Hamara zikr jab aye to thora muskura dena!
Khushi ka ho ya phir ghum ka,
Bus ik ansu gira dena…..
Dosti me dooriyan to aati rehti hain,
Phir bhi Dosti Dilo ko mila deti hai,
Wo Dost hi kya jo naraz na ho,

Per sachchi Dosti Dosto ko mana hi leti hai.

English translation (more or less)

If i go away,
get lost in the world,
tell me what will you do?
will you search for me,
or forget me,
call me, 
or write my name in a forgotten story,
alright do it,
change yourself, and forget me,
but i have one request,
whenever i will be mentioned, just smile a little!
whether it is happy or sad thought, just drop a single tear..
there are distances in a friendship, 
but friendship unites hearts,
what is a friendship that doesn’t have differences,
but a true friendship always convinces friends.

Anonymous

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A personal thought about a public issue…the Delhi gang rape

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Howdy again!

I am following this gang rape case in India past weeks, actually since it happened and I must say that I had plenty of time to create my own opinions by now, as an outsider of course. I was not keen to talk about this what so ever before, but I don’t know why, today I’m choosing to express my opinion about all this. Maybe it happens because I’m sick and tired to see how this whole thing is treated generally speaking by Indian politics, police and some masses.

I am not going to give lessons of how rape cases should be treated in India, I will only speak from a normal woman point of view, about the safety of a country which I would like to visit soon, thing that unfortunately becomes the issue of safety of the entire society itself as these things happening daily everywhere, not only in India. So here we go.

On December 16th, gang rape of a 23 years old girl happened. She was travelling with her boy friend, in order to reach home, after they saw a movie. What a crime they did right? How could they travel by night (9 pm as far as I understood). Why she was dressed up in a western style, why she got in that bus? These are a few questions police and other leaders asked before asking one important question. Why there is no safety for women, for everyone at any hour of day or night?

Soon mass opinion went on fire, thousands of youths went out in streets demanding justice, which is a very brave action to take and appreciate. But another question raises here: why justice has to be demand? It’s not a right of the modern times, it’s not a common thing we expect from those who pretend to protect us?

On December 29th, the poor girl dies in a hospital in Singapore. Now rapists become murders also and still justice has not been made, they still are questioning in which circumstances this happened, if the girl actually incited them to rape her, to assault and harass her. What about her friend, he also did that? Why they beat him up so badly? Just because they didn’t stand to the criminals hints, it means they should punish them in that way?

Police and political leaders said women should avoid travelling alone in night, but the thing is that she was not alone, those criminals not even gave second thought that her friend might stop them and this is not the only such case happening. My question here is: why police try to make women live a more detention at home life, instead of protecting them as they expect would happen? Why they question their dressing instead of questioning the men’s behavior? What explanation they have for rapes happening in villages, or little girls harassment, are they dressed in an improper way too? What about family involved criminals, or police officers, doctors, teachers, priests, people in which we have trust?? What about girls or women wearing burka, who were also raped? What answer they have for this? But these are questions who many people asked and not received answers yet.

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They are thinking to invest money in women drivers for school buses, taxi drivers, more women police officers, proper school uniform for girls, laws banning different behaviors when it comes to women, but they did not give any thought to actually educate men for a zero rape society, they did not thought to change mentality of men officers in police districts, they did not thought to add some specific criteria tests for those who want to work in specific places. They will create division between women and men in the society, but do this division will make a difference, or the actual proper education?

I’m sure that in each case they will anyway find a reason for criminals and a guilt for victims.

I’m not judging India only, nor it’s politics, it’s corruption, because rape is happening in many other places in the world, even in those countries in which reading about this case in India people will appear horrified. This is happening in countries in which women are falsely deceived with their equal status, with their safety. Violence against women, in any particular way exists everywhere, in my motherland Romania, in Italy, the country I live now, in U.S.A, in UK, everywhere, it’s not a consequence of low developed countries, as much as some would like to say. We like it or not, patriarchal based culture seeks here too, more or less. We might live it, or not, it can happen according to the education we received in our families. Depends on how our father treats our mother, our uncle treats our aunty and so on. Depends on what they teach us in schools, depends on friends we will have, entourage etc.

Maybe the difference between these places will be that people don’t appear so horrified all the time, at least not in the active way, they don’t go out on streets and police, yeah with all corruption, many of the times do their job and put charge on rapist/criminals according to the law, without questioning so much the victim. I think it’s about how lucky you are to get born in a place or another, it’s about percentage of safety, because we are not 100% safe anywhere, it’s about laws and about how police act and political leaders treat this matter.

So, what do I blame in the behavior of Indian police and political leaders is exactly this passivity or wrong way indictment, in front of this kind of criminal acts and I’m not talking about the Delhi’s gang rape only, but of all rapes happening daily in whole country, their blindness, towards the actual real reasons of why this happening in India, reasons that have nothing to do with the dressing style, or going out in night, or having a specific behavior, but only with the bad luck of being there in a wrong place at a wrong moment in which some criminals can’t keep their manhood inside. They just have the bad luck of being part of a lower cast, or working for the wrong man, or studying into the wrong class, boarding the wrong bus, reporting their harassment to the wrong police officer, and so on..

I think I would have so many other things to say about this, I have already said too much, though, so I will end up this long opinion with a hope, that people, especially those in charge of things will finally detect the main problems to solve and to pay attention at, so that these kind of atrocities stop everywhere. I hope they will accept that there are things missing and must be adjust soon. I hope they will realize that if men won’t see women as desire only, violence against women in many ways, will stop.

R.I.P. to the gang rape girl along with all those around the world, who died in these circumstances. Also a deep thought for those who didn’t died and have to live their hell made life, more or less.

I will add this link, for a further reading: http://www.nytimes.com/2013/01/08/opinion/after-being-raped-i-was-wounded-my-honor-wasnt.html?_r=0

La mulţi ani, România!!

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La mulţi ani, România. Multă fericire şi zile frumoase să ai, nu doar de 1 Decembrie. Îţi doresc ca “fiii” tăi să se gândească la tine şi în celelalte 364 de zile în care te badjocoresc, te nenorocesc pe zi ce trece, şi te lasă uitată într-un şanţ după ce te prădează cu nesimţire.

Eşti frumoasă, foarte frumoasă, ca o femeie la a doua tinereţe, din păcate doar străinii de pe stradă te admiră şi încearcă să-ţi găsească şi calităţi printre defecte, familia în schimb, te lasă de izbelişte.

Eşti nevastă acum, nu te aştepta să mai fii cucerită, nu aştepta drăgălăşenii şi iubire pasională, mulţumeşte-te cu firimituri şi cu atenţii doar de ziua ta.

Copiii îţi sunt mari, fiecare încearcă să îşi vadă de drum, de o viaţă mai bună, unii rămân cu tine pe baricade, alţii ca mine, cu toată dragostea şi respectul te trădează cu o alta, nu neapărat mai bună ca tine, dar poate mai prosperă, sau poate nici prosperă, ci doar cu o sclipire în plus, un vis, o împlinire.

Unii ar da vina pe tine, dar adevărul îl ştim bine noi două, îl ştie toată lumea doar că îl ignoră. Se prefac că nu văd, se prefac că e normal ceea ce se întâmplă la tine în casă. E normal să fii batjocorită cu asemenea cruzime, iar apoi să fii silită să-ţi iubeşti agresorii. Iar eu ce fac, aleg să întorc privirea şi să plec, să te las aşa, deşi văd că suferi, ştiu că nu pot face nimic, nu acum, poate mai târziu, dacă nu va fi prea târziu…

La mulţi ani, România. Capul sus, viitorul e înainte şi speranţa moare ultima, speranţa că va fi mai bine, deşi zi de zi mergem spre mai rău. Din când în când câte o licărire, o luminiţă la capătul tunelului, un curcubeu după ploaie îşi va face apariţia, chiar dacă după aceea dispare şi reapare şi dispare…

Va veni şi momentul tău, stai liniştită, respiră, cu ultima vlagă, respiră…şi totul va fi bine…

Nu-mi cere să mă întorc la tine, nu acum, poate mai târziu când vei înflori, că aşa sunt eu, egoistă şi te vreau doar când e bine, dar spune-mi tu, Românie…nu asta vrem toţi?!!

La mulţi ani, România!

Contemplating the change…

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Really one year and some 12 hours passed away since I haven’t wrote something on my blog? I can not believe this. This time dimension is quite challenging and in such a hurry, I can never keep step with it. It’s like everything happened yesterday…

Anyway, howdy to you all…although I don’t think you still following me, since I haven’t wrote a single word passed one year. I would definitely not do that..

Short and quick update, well many things happened in this year and still happening, I was quite busy with my work, my studies and yeah, why not, my vacation. Nowadays I am aware more and more, of how much life away from my country changed me…Being away from my daily safety, from those things I knew for sure, from those streets I was waking with eyes closed, from those people I knew how to talk with..from friends…everything changed, my way of seeing life, things around me, people around me…I even changed my job view and my future plans..

Still consider myself lucky, because I have my family with me, which is quite a relief, although not having my love near me, is very uncomfortable and difficult to deal with…

Anyway I love one thing being here, and this would be my connection with other people, with other cultures, other nations, other ways of thinking, of living..I am learning everyday something new about the world around me and this is just making me so happy and so lucky.
When you are part of a minority, your life becomes something else! This happened to me and I have totally changed my approach towards my living, my present and especially my future, I’m fighting for my views, my rights, my duties, my place in this society. Things I have retained as a right in Romania, actually as already served package, here I am retaining it to be a gained right, with struggle and work, for which I am fighting day by day.
This is the truth of the society in which we are living, same thing is happening in Romania, maybe more, otherwise why so many people would even think to choose leaving their country…

I’ve made my choice to talk about this today, because this is the thought of my endless headache, which torments me passed some time..which I am actually contemplating, because I like the change is happening with me and this is because of my status and because I had the opportunity to meet all those awesome people, with whom I did amazing things…they gave me even more plans for my future and I can only thank them for this…one of these amazing people is my love, my jaan…

I hope will be back around soon..see ya!

Dreaming to reach the Mecca of my childhood stories

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Travelling is one of the things I wish I could do in the near future, and that because of my passion for knowing and learning new things everyday, explore new places and new cultures. The list of my favourite places, or, as I like to call them, must seen before dying places, is pretty long, although the one I want to see first and get to know better is India.

India is indeed incredible with its good and bad things, with great ancient culture, Maharajas and Maharanies stories, but also with poverty and simplicity, with exceptional brains and an unfortunate high level of corruption, but in the end with extremely awesome and unknown tones of colours and superb, warm and accolient people.

Well, in a sort of way, my bizare dream, has its beginning in my childhood, when I’ve becomed addicted to the Bollywood movies I was getting chance to see in cinema, with my mother. Although, the most important thing that made me love India with its traditions and colours, architecture and people, was the way in which my mum used to tell me a story based on a movie she saw when she was young. Not so much and not so impressive either, at a first side look, but the way she was telling me that story was marvelleous and as a child as I was, back then, at only four or five years old, that story captured me so much, that I’ve started to want to know more about everything she was telling me.

So, as the time passed, I’ve started to search for as many things as I could about that place in the world, she made me dream of. I was searching for indian music, movies, books, stories, everything, feeding my curiosity and also my soul with every crumb of information I could find, suffering for the poverty of information of that time. Since I am romanian, computer and internet facility came into my life a bit later and historical books about India, could not be found at every step, so I remember that even at school, loving history in general, I was expecially attracted of those lessons that were taking me to another world, to the Oriental and Extreme Oriental world, focussing my attention on indian culture and religion background. After all these years, I am still searching for any tiny thing that can make me understand and know better the indian society and life, but I am sure that I could only get to know India, its people and its culture, by going there and live all those feelings I am searching now.

That’s why, in this very moment, I just wish I could see this lovely country that made me descover myself, my wishes, my dreams, my future. It may seem a weird dream, but this is my story and I know that one sunny day, my bare feet will touch that ground, my eyes will see that light blue sky and my heart will feel that tremendous feeling of being, home. The child in me, still believes in a fairytale country named India.

When future becomes past…

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I remember those days, in which I kept promising myself I will never change, when sky was light blue with pink dots, when there were no more worries then the “heavy” homework I had to do for the next day, or those “difficult” projects I had to finish.

I also remember those crazy things I used to do, those special moments I used to spend with my friends and again those promises, we all used to make, and that now are just some old memories for long forgotten in our subconscious. We used to say that we will be the same even after 10 or 15 years, that we will dress the same way, talk in the same way, behave in same way, never give up our piercings, tattoos or colored hair, without realizing that the biggest truth was in fact our, day by day, changing.

I do realize it once at 1 or 2 years, when I see my old photos, take a look at them, then take a look in the mirror, seeing a way different person. I’m not dressing the same way, I don’t have purple hair anymore, I don’t have the same expectations from life, nor same purposes. I even keep thinking if I want to put my piercing on again or not.

But the most important thing is that I don’t have regrets, I just feel more mature and also I feel that changes came when I needed so. I’m not giving up my true spirit, nor my principles of life, I’m just loosing the old me, the one that was fine a few years ago, but it’s not anymore, the same way I know, I will not be as I am today, two years from now.

Changing is good when it comes at the right moment, when it makes you become better and when it’s coming from the inside…